Whether or not I believe so strongly in astrological signs, I have to say that mine is pretty true to a lot of my personality traits. I'm a Taurus, an earth sign, and I love stability. Moving to Israel was okay, since, in essence, we were moving home. But moving from apartment to apartment every year, is taking a toll on me. Every new place we move, I have dreams of decorations, classy but comfortable furniture, new dishes, getting printed canvases of our pictures and the list literally goes on and on and on. I've never really felt settled in to a place. For instance, the apartment we live in now came furnished. I didn't realize it when we picked the place, but the furniture is ugly. Also, the bigger issue is that it didn't come with an oven (only a built in stove top). When we moved in last year, we figured we'd get an oven and find a place for it in the kitchen. Then we realized that there was no room in the apartment for an oven, unless we wanted it to be the main attraction of the living room. So, we waited and waited, thinking maybe magically our apartment would expand. Now we're moving in a month and I am the most creative cook out there---well, maybe not but I definitely have a lot of experience in stove top and crock pot recipes. It's interesting that simply not having an oven could prevent me from feeling settled in. I guess that and the fact that we've been "throwing away" 3,500 nis every month on an apartment that we'll never own.
Our landlord wants to raise the apartment 500 nis for the next tenant. I personally think it's a little crazy. That amounts to about 1,080 American dollars per month including building maintenance, but that doesn't include city tax or any of the utilities. (Did I mention it's a one bedroom apartment?) It's also a little frustrating for us because we want to leave our contract a month early, which is fine with her, but we have to help her find a new renter. Since the location is in extremely high demand, it shouldn't be so difficult. The thing is, our landlord is very very picky when it comes to her is living in her apartment. So this task has proven to be a challenging one. Within the first day of listing the apartment online, we already had 3 different people interested. 2 out of the 3 wanted to go for it, and others have been interested since. Unfortunately, our landlord has found reasons not to rent it out them. I'm actually getting a little worried, because if we don't move out by January 15, we'll be paying double rent for an entire month- 3,500 for the Jerusalem apartment and 2,800 for the one in Efrat. Yay, Efrat!!! We are really excited about it, and the community seems wonderful from what we can tell so far.
A single woman came to check out our apartment yesterday. She actually lives in our building, but wants something a little different. I'm hoping and praying it works out. She didn't seem to like the colors on our walls---who can blame her? I mean, it is a little intense. Blue, cream and RED in the bedroom. It was those colors when we came in. Honestly, though, it's a nice change from white walls. Our new apartment has a pleasant off white color. It's completely new, no one has lived there yet, so the paint job and everything else about it is beautiful.
I wonder how many years post-aliyah it will take until we feel home IN our home. I guess we could just live in a cardboard box by the Western Wall, and then we'd be the CLOSEST to home. Someone once told me that she also feels the same way about the places they lived and that she has started to think of it in a positive light, "This life is temporary, and so are all the things in it. So why should I feel attached to all these places and things when they are of actually very little importance?"
I totally hear that, but...I still want a home, and I don't think there's anything wrong with it. The next apartment is lookin' good to me though, and I'm going to do my best to make it the coziest, loveliest, homey place yet.
Shabbat Shalom!
Friday, December 24, 2010
Sunday, December 12, 2010
Stormy weather
I literally haven't stepped outside since Friday morning. Just looking out my window is enough for me right now. Ziva and I stayed in our pajamas all day, and she's been so cuddly! Nap time was wonderful- 1 pm-4:30 pm, and I was actually sleeping for most of it too! When we went to America, I bought the cutest snowflake pajama pants. I totally associate this season with some kind of winter wonderland, not this stormy and windy weather. It's a little weird not to have 5 feet of snow outside my door, car doors iced shut and clouds of breath filling the air. Snow is enchanting. It's like a sweet blanket of beauty, well at least from the inside, sitting by the fire and drinking hot cocoa.
There is something a little gloomy about these past couple days besides the weather. It has been one test after another of my strength. I'm not going to break down. I'm not going to break down.
It actually reminds me of this time in Tzfat that I went to a massage therapist. She was Russian, and only spoke Russian and Hebrew. Yehoshua came along to translate, and we were both shocked by the inspiring words she spoke. Firstly, she told me that by looking at my feet she could tell that I was an extremely sensitive and spiritual person. I am highly affected and aware of experiences that happen in my life. She also said that I hold a lot of tension in my shoulders and neck which can mean that if someone says or does something that I don't think is right, I am overly bothered by it. I completely resonated with the things she said about me. Then she began to explain to us what she had learned about perspective, "There are only two things in this world. Creator and the created. If you are the created, then EVERYTHING else is the Creator. If your neighbor does something bad to you, then G-d is trying to teach you something. There's no reason to get angry or upset, you should only take that opportunity to fix a character trait within yourself."
I really try to think that way, and it was nice to have her there to remind me during a time that was stressful. I'm happy that I thought of it now because it's so important to step back and look at the whole situation. Even still, I can't help but wonder why am I so darn sensitive? Why did G-d give me this trait? How can I use it to the best of my ability without letting it get me down? Today someone said something offensive to me, and I literally laid on Shua's shoulder and cried. Maybe it's post-partum hormonal stuff, but I'm pretty sure I've always been this way. It's hard to understand that everything is good, all the time. I saw this on Rabbi Manis Friedman's Facebook status the other day, "Darkness cannot be swept away with a broom. In order to abolish darkness, one must bring forth light by increasing in knowledge of holy things. Learn more and you will understand on a greater level."
So I guess I should learn more. And hopefully, the sun will come out tomorrow! :)
There is something a little gloomy about these past couple days besides the weather. It has been one test after another of my strength. I'm not going to break down. I'm not going to break down.
It actually reminds me of this time in Tzfat that I went to a massage therapist. She was Russian, and only spoke Russian and Hebrew. Yehoshua came along to translate, and we were both shocked by the inspiring words she spoke. Firstly, she told me that by looking at my feet she could tell that I was an extremely sensitive and spiritual person. I am highly affected and aware of experiences that happen in my life. She also said that I hold a lot of tension in my shoulders and neck which can mean that if someone says or does something that I don't think is right, I am overly bothered by it. I completely resonated with the things she said about me. Then she began to explain to us what she had learned about perspective, "There are only two things in this world. Creator and the created. If you are the created, then EVERYTHING else is the Creator. If your neighbor does something bad to you, then G-d is trying to teach you something. There's no reason to get angry or upset, you should only take that opportunity to fix a character trait within yourself."
I really try to think that way, and it was nice to have her there to remind me during a time that was stressful. I'm happy that I thought of it now because it's so important to step back and look at the whole situation. Even still, I can't help but wonder why am I so darn sensitive? Why did G-d give me this trait? How can I use it to the best of my ability without letting it get me down? Today someone said something offensive to me, and I literally laid on Shua's shoulder and cried. Maybe it's post-partum hormonal stuff, but I'm pretty sure I've always been this way. It's hard to understand that everything is good, all the time. I saw this on Rabbi Manis Friedman's Facebook status the other day, "Darkness cannot be swept away with a broom. In order to abolish darkness, one must bring forth light by increasing in knowledge of holy things. Learn more and you will understand on a greater level."
So I guess I should learn more. And hopefully, the sun will come out tomorrow! :)
Tuesday, December 7, 2010
What life might be like with twins
I've always wondered how mothers do it with more than one baby. I just figured that since they have no other choice, they somehow manage. Today was the first day that I found out what it might be like with two kids or even twins!
Ziva has a new friend! His name is Yotam, and I have committed to taking care of him while his mother, Adina, goes to school for about 15 hours a week. I thought it would be a nice side-income that would still allow me to be a stay at home mama. Although I love babies and I have experience working at a daycare, I wasn't sure how the first day would go. It went amazingly!!! I woke up an hour before they arrived, at 7 am to organize the play area and freshen up. Good thing I did that because they came 10 minutes early. Yotam is a really cute and chilled out baby. I made him laugh first thing in the morning, which impressed Adina. Ziva and Shua were still sleeping in the other room when they came, so it gave me some time to talk details about bottles, nap time, preferences, etc. Then Adina left, and it was time to party!
When he left, I really appreciated some special time with my princess. She is SO sweet, she's my little cupcake! When I hug her, I honestly do not know how to contain my love...do I squeeze her tighter? Can I eat her? Should I sing her love songs? How do you express your motherly love?
I'm looking forward to tomorrow. As long as Shua makes me his famously yummy coffee in the morning, I got this!
Ziva has a new friend! His name is Yotam, and I have committed to taking care of him while his mother, Adina, goes to school for about 15 hours a week. I thought it would be a nice side-income that would still allow me to be a stay at home mama. Although I love babies and I have experience working at a daycare, I wasn't sure how the first day would go. It went amazingly!!! I woke up an hour before they arrived, at 7 am to organize the play area and freshen up. Good thing I did that because they came 10 minutes early. Yotam is a really cute and chilled out baby. I made him laugh first thing in the morning, which impressed Adina. Ziva and Shua were still sleeping in the other room when they came, so it gave me some time to talk details about bottles, nap time, preferences, etc. Then Adina left, and it was time to party!
Ziva Menucha
Yotam
Yotam
We went out to get some fresh air and spend a bit of time at my attachment parenting playgroup. I have to say that I was BUBBLING WITH HAPPINESS. I wore Ziva, and pushed Yotam in his stroller...
I couldn't explain it to Shua, but I was so delighted to have the opportunity to take care of these two little neshamot. On our walk, I chattered away with a silly smile on my face. I could definitely picture having two babies one day, and I think I was proud of myself for taking this job. The rest of the day went really well. They both napped twice during the same time! If that's not a miracle, I don't know what is. The only part that was challenging was when Ziva and Yotam were hungry at the same moment. I figured out how to nurse Ziva while holding the bottle for Yotam as he sat in a baby bouncer. It was a pretty funny site!
I couldn't explain it to Shua, but I was so delighted to have the opportunity to take care of these two little neshamot. On our walk, I chattered away with a silly smile on my face. I could definitely picture having two babies one day, and I think I was proud of myself for taking this job. The rest of the day went really well. They both napped twice during the same time! If that's not a miracle, I don't know what is. The only part that was challenging was when Ziva and Yotam were hungry at the same moment. I figured out how to nurse Ziva while holding the bottle for Yotam as he sat in a baby bouncer. It was a pretty funny site!
When he left, I really appreciated some special time with my princess. She is SO sweet, she's my little cupcake! When I hug her, I honestly do not know how to contain my love...do I squeeze her tighter? Can I eat her? Should I sing her love songs? How do you express your motherly love?
I'm looking forward to tomorrow. As long as Shua makes me his famously yummy coffee in the morning, I got this!
Monday, December 6, 2010
Traveling without a car in Israel
Last month, we decided it was time to find a new home. It will be our third home in Israel, but I guess good things come in threes so maybe it will be a perfect fit. We've been traveling by foot, by stroller and by bus. I am proud to say that we are much better packers, walkers and people because of it. I used to be such a baby about traveling. I remember during my first year here, I would always opt for the taxi cab, and I felt the money was well worth it. Now, I couldn't feel more differently.
The bus system is set up really well in Israel. We have multiple bus stops right outside our apartment building that have lines which go all over Jerusalem. Of course, if we want to travel further out, we have to get to the central bus station which is about a 25 minute walk. (In my time, not Shua's) So every Friday for the past month we've had a routine.
So far, this has worked pretty well for us, except for...well, there are a couple exceptions. On our way to Ma'aleh Adumim a few weeks ago, we put the backpack in the bottom of the stroller. We even said to each other that there was NO WAY it could fall out without us noticing. It was one of those hiking backpacks that are fairly large.
Anyway, we got on the bus by the central bus station and could not have felt more relieved to be on our way, when Shua says, "Where's the backpack?"
OMG! It was no where to be found. He quickly folded up the stroller and put it to the side with some of our random bags hanging off it. I was already sitting in my seat with Ziva on my lap. We decided he should get off at the next stop and run back to look for it. It had all of our toiletries, nice Shabbat clothes, along with some of the cutest things from Ziva's wardrobe. He got off, while I stayed on headed to Ma'aleh Adumim. Phone rang. Couldn't find it. Phone rang again. Still couldn't find it. Phone rang. I missed it. (Ziva was becoming very unhappy.) I called him back and heard yelling in the background.
I called again, "#$#@@! (Shua hardly ever swears) Rivkah, they just blew up our backpack and they are going to fine me for it!"
Tears starting rolling down my cheeks. I was sweating, uncomfortable and I had no idea how I was going to get off the bus with Ziva and all of our stuff without Shua. I didn't even really know which stop to get off at.
Apparently, Shua had run down to Rechov Agrippas (Street of the shuk) when he realized where we might have dropped it. We stopped there to take Ziva out of her stroller because she was exhausted and wasn't falling asleep. As he approached the "scene" he yelled out to one of the security people, "That's my bag...." and BOOM! Hardly any of the remains were usable. My phone charger survived.
Someone started taking down his ID number, and told him he was going to get fined for his mistake. Another person came up to him and told him he wasn't going to get fined, and he should take the items to a place to get money back for them. Then a store owner on the street started screaming at Shua. He said that we lost him business because of all the chaos, and that the right thing to do was to pay him 1,000 shekel. "If I had 1,000 shekel to pay you, I would."
The store owner ended up bringing him a trash bag to put our blown up clothing in, and made a comment that it was too bad all the diapers were ruined.
And that was that. I was so upset that I thought I would never laugh about it. Yet, here I am writing this with a smirk on my face. As corny as it is, when it comes down to it, materialistic things mean so little. When I took a deep breath, and wrapped my arms around the two people I love most, the backpack didn't seem like such a big deal anymore.
Oh yeah, and this past week, we lost a wheel on our nice peg perego stroller (it got lost under the bus where everything is stored). We just looked at each other and didn't say anything.
One day we'll have a car. DEFINITELY before our second baby, G-d willing.
The bus system is set up really well in Israel. We have multiple bus stops right outside our apartment building that have lines which go all over Jerusalem. Of course, if we want to travel further out, we have to get to the central bus station which is about a 25 minute walk. (In my time, not Shua's) So every Friday for the past month we've had a routine.
- Wake up as early as possible
- I take a shower and get dressed while Shua plays with Ziva
- Shua takes a shower while I feed, diaper and dress her
- Shua gets dressed and then keeps an eye on Ziva while she plays
- We both frantically get our backpack of clothing together, half of which is Ziva's
- I put on my make up and complain about how I can't find anything and I need more head scarves
- We try to manage to eat something, if we're lucky
- I probably have to feed Ziva again, just to make sure she's okay for the walk ahead of us
- We debate what stroller to bring and whether we should take a cab to the central bus station
- We never take a cab
- We pass by the shuk on the way, and pick up wine or dessert for our hosts
- Then we literally walk as fast as we can, without talking, to the central bus station
So far, this has worked pretty well for us, except for...well, there are a couple exceptions. On our way to Ma'aleh Adumim a few weeks ago, we put the backpack in the bottom of the stroller. We even said to each other that there was NO WAY it could fall out without us noticing. It was one of those hiking backpacks that are fairly large.
Anyway, we got on the bus by the central bus station and could not have felt more relieved to be on our way, when Shua says, "Where's the backpack?"
OMG! It was no where to be found. He quickly folded up the stroller and put it to the side with some of our random bags hanging off it. I was already sitting in my seat with Ziva on my lap. We decided he should get off at the next stop and run back to look for it. It had all of our toiletries, nice Shabbat clothes, along with some of the cutest things from Ziva's wardrobe. He got off, while I stayed on headed to Ma'aleh Adumim. Phone rang. Couldn't find it. Phone rang again. Still couldn't find it. Phone rang. I missed it. (Ziva was becoming very unhappy.) I called him back and heard yelling in the background.
I called again, "#$#@@! (Shua hardly ever swears) Rivkah, they just blew up our backpack and they are going to fine me for it!"
Tears starting rolling down my cheeks. I was sweating, uncomfortable and I had no idea how I was going to get off the bus with Ziva and all of our stuff without Shua. I didn't even really know which stop to get off at.
Apparently, Shua had run down to Rechov Agrippas (Street of the shuk) when he realized where we might have dropped it. We stopped there to take Ziva out of her stroller because she was exhausted and wasn't falling asleep. As he approached the "scene" he yelled out to one of the security people, "That's my bag...." and BOOM! Hardly any of the remains were usable. My phone charger survived.
Someone started taking down his ID number, and told him he was going to get fined for his mistake. Another person came up to him and told him he wasn't going to get fined, and he should take the items to a place to get money back for them. Then a store owner on the street started screaming at Shua. He said that we lost him business because of all the chaos, and that the right thing to do was to pay him 1,000 shekel. "If I had 1,000 shekel to pay you, I would."
The store owner ended up bringing him a trash bag to put our blown up clothing in, and made a comment that it was too bad all the diapers were ruined.
And that was that. I was so upset that I thought I would never laugh about it. Yet, here I am writing this with a smirk on my face. As corny as it is, when it comes down to it, materialistic things mean so little. When I took a deep breath, and wrapped my arms around the two people I love most, the backpack didn't seem like such a big deal anymore.
Oh yeah, and this past week, we lost a wheel on our nice peg perego stroller (it got lost under the bus where everything is stored). We just looked at each other and didn't say anything.
One day we'll have a car. DEFINITELY before our second baby, G-d willing.
Thursday, December 2, 2010
Once upon a time
I just chowed down at least three slices of turkey in preparation for this blog post, and there are fish sticks in the toaster oven. (Yes, still exclusively breastfeeding. 6 months and going strong!) These days, I eat more than my husband does. "Honey, are you really still hungry?"
"Yes, I'm starving."
"Wow, I just can't relate."
If we were newly married, I honestly would have been mortified.
ANYWAY, I decided to start a blog, with a little bit of encouragement from my wonderful friends. I don't know how anyone starts a "Mommy blog" before their baby is 6 months. Please tell me when there is time.
{Motherhood} is an unbelievably rewarding, completely fulfilling, endlessly motivating, FULL-TIME JOB. I will never think any differently. It can be quite a roller coaster ride of emotions. I never imagined I would be able to love in this way before...or cry in this way before...or want to buy a pair of boxing gloves in this way before. I'm thankful for my shoulder to lean on, my best friend, my husband. He's awesome. If I have to buy boxing gloves one day, thank the L-RD I have someone on my team.
I don't really know where this blog will go or how many people will actually read it, but I have to say that I'm quite excited about writing again. I miss seeing my thoughts on paper.
Thanks for your interest in my life. That's not sarcastic, I'm serious.
"Yes, I'm starving."
"Wow, I just can't relate."
If we were newly married, I honestly would have been mortified.
ANYWAY, I decided to start a blog, with a little bit of encouragement from my wonderful friends. I don't know how anyone starts a "Mommy blog" before their baby is 6 months. Please tell me when there is time.
{Motherhood} is an unbelievably rewarding, completely fulfilling, endlessly motivating, FULL-TIME JOB. I will never think any differently. It can be quite a roller coaster ride of emotions. I never imagined I would be able to love in this way before...or cry in this way before...or want to buy a pair of boxing gloves in this way before. I'm thankful for my shoulder to lean on, my best friend, my husband. He's awesome. If I have to buy boxing gloves one day, thank the L-RD I have someone on my team.
I don't really know where this blog will go or how many people will actually read it, but I have to say that I'm quite excited about writing again. I miss seeing my thoughts on paper.
Thanks for your interest in my life. That's not sarcastic, I'm serious.
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