Life is simple?

There is something so awesome about simplicity. The other day, Yehoshua and I were going through e-mails we wrote to each other while we were dating, and I was shocked by how much I've changed in these past few years. The banter was silly, sweet, profound but the thing that stood out to me most was how free-spirited we were. The truth is that we were able to be carefree because we literally didn't have any responsibilities outside of ourselves. It was a nice feeling, I remember it clearly. Especially living in Tsfat, we were in our own world. A spiritual world that only spanned a couple miles yet reached far into our souls. I remember having so many remarkable epiphanies about my own life and life in general, about G-d, about relationships, about complicated things that turned out to actually be simple. It was nice being able to wake up and daven Shacharit on the roof that overlooked Meron with birds chirping and the mountain breeze dancing through my hair. It really was as dreamy as I am describing it. It was nice that my biggest worry was hardly a worry at all, and that anything I wanted was at my fingertips. On top of it all, we were head over heals in love- the kind of love that makes everything you eat taste better, puts a smile on your face as you drift off to sleep and makes your heart jump at the thought of each other. Everything is illuminated when you experience love in the purest form.

So we got married, and we didn't worry about anything. Love can conquer all, and even after everything we have gone through, I still believe that. I will always believe that. Who needs food when love can feed your soul? Okay okay, maybe I would have said that when we were in Tsfat, but now I would give that same girl a reality check. With marriage, comes responsibilities- bills, cooking, cleaning, more bills, big life decisions, moving, more bills, careers... and when your bundle of joy arrives, expect those responsibilities to triple. Between trying to make money, taking care of every physical and emotional need of a little baby and running a household- where is the time to connect? When can you think? When can you philosphise about life, lie in a park staring at the clouds, read a book in bed on a random morning or sit happily in captivating silence?

Shabbat gives us a taste of that kind of simplicity, a rare opportunity to leave our physicality a bit and connect with real people instead of computer screens and the stop the work that comes with our every day life. As parents, our responsibilities don't stop just because it's Shabbat, and we're lucky to get in our afternoon nap... between hosting guests, entertaining our kids, changing diapers, making sure they eat enough, sleep enough, interact nicely with their friends, etc. How can we truly appreciate the moment that were in and not worry about anything else but that moment? Like when Ziva giggles or dances, the feeling is amazing, I'm on top of the world- yet a second later, I'm thinking about the dishes in the sink, the phone calls I have to make, the appointments I've been putting off, how are we going to afford this or that, etc.

Although a carefree life is appealing, there is an underlying sadness to it. With no one to care for, life is lonely, way too easy and unrewarding. I wouldn't change my life for anything because I can't tell what kind of joy I have been blessed with. During my seminary year, I read the book the Garden of Emuna, Emuna meaning faith in G-d. It explains, with practical examples, how our faith in G-d can lead us to living an enriching and happy life. It sounds a little extreme, but without some form of Emuna, that kind of life is not possible. I have to remind myself that everything is for a reason, everything we need will come in due time, we're being taken care of and watched over, we can connect to G-d and we can influence our destiny. Contrary to popular belief, having faith in G-d is not the easy way out. In many ways, it's really very challenging to always see G-d in every situation, especially the hard ones.

I don't want to have to stop and smell the roses-I want to always smell them! I want life to be simple! I want to be eternally happy and stress-free... I wish we could hold hands and skip along a dirt path, smile with flirtatious glances and stop in the middle of the street just to dance or sing or be silly together.

I would love to hear ways that you all incorporate simplicity into our crazy lives. Where do you go and what do you do to attain your personal bliss?